Sunday, March 31, 2013

Not Getting It

"My broadcast was terminated 3 times 
in one day for 'inactivity!!'
Hello? It's a show about nothing!
What am I supposed to be doing?"

Putting Me in Equation Conundrums

viewer sends an e-mail:
"You want nothing to do with me? 
You can't handle me, honey. 
You can't handle the power of my awesome."

"What's to handle?
Go be 'awesome.'
Be awesome to the tenth power.
Excellent! Kudos! 
What does your 'awesome' have to do with me?
I never even met you."

Free Will

"I would rather be waterboarded than to have to 
listen to marjorie's voice during her broadcast."

"So who forces you to constantly enter and 
keep watching the show, meshugennah?
You must be a masochistic glutton for punishment."

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Choice Comments from An Online Stranger

"(You will) die alone in your NYC apartment 
where you won't be found until the smell and bedbugs 
 overwhelm the apartment complex. 
 Your tombstone will read: who the f*ck was marjorie...'" 

"Yikes! Bedbugs! Huh?"
I need to be on a constant online kook watch!"

"I am a bon vivant and I have a great joie de vivre! 
I hope that writer's personality profile of me is not included 
in her applications to administer 
cyber Thematic Apperception Tests!"

"Anger management much?"

Monday, March 25, 2013


"A chatter called me a 'crow!'
If I am a 'crow' she has to be 
the crow's  ugly stepsister."

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Low Level Thinkers in Low Level Entertainment

"marjorie is a stupid person
marjorie is boring
marjorie is a pathetic liar
marjorie is a troll
marjorie is a c**t
marjorie is f**ked in the head."

"waaaaaa, nobody likes me here.
I am packing up my toys and going elsewhere."

Sitting Shiva

"I will be sitting shiva for BlogTV.

You were loved very much...
RIP dear website.

The end: 3/27/2013."

Kick Permissions

viewer to broadcaster
"Can I kick marjorie on your last show?"

"Why wait until the last show, darling? 
If that is all it takes to excite you and 
help you find your smile, 
kick away! Kick me all day. I aim to please." 

"When I give kick permission to a sad soul...
I am doing a mitzvah and 
Aren't I one.guta.neshuma?" 

Tuesday, March 12, 2013


"marjorie, have you got your drinking under control these days?"

"Look at this nutty question now!
My idea of a hot toddy is prune juice with lemon.
Some chatters will type anything in their 
quest to shock, create a dynamic of conflict, 
and become a cyber Don Quixiote. "

The Face Police

"Hi beast, you need a face lift."

"Thank-you, Hazel Bishop. 
Should I worry that my contract with 
the Ford Agency will not be renewed?"

Ouch Worthy?

chatters' comments
1. "marjorie despises other people for having the good 
qualities and traits she lacks so she rejoices in 
being evil and making people hate her."
2. "marjorie hates cute girls who are better educated than she is."

"Ah, rejoice! These comments are from total 
strangers who I never even met. 
Their skills at cyber analysis are amazing...
but a suggestion." 

 "They should bottle their comments and include them on 
university applications as evidence of their 
mad skills in creative writing. 
I am sure the admissions' committees will be impressed!"

Unraveling in Alternate Universes

"For those of you wondering, here's why 
many of us despise marjorie: 
we tried to befriend her and she sh*t on us, 
trolled us, lied to us, and stabbed us in the back. 
She's a sh*t, period. I stuck up for her in the past. 
People tried to warn me and I didn't believe it. 
I stood up for her and then she did it to me 
and I got what I deserved for not listening."

"Who is that hysterical person having a cyber meltdown? 
It seems a bit absurd that I could have 
done such dire things to a person and had such 
an horrendous impact on a person whose 
identity is totally unknown to me." 

"My cyber fingerprints and DNA came up 
negative on that profile document.
He needs to reconnect his VCRs and chill,
and enter a hyperbaric chamber for a reality check
regarding his social interactions."

Monday, March 11, 2013

The True Character

"I know that every single person typing 
redundant vituperative comments directed to me 
would, in person, be all tongue tied 
with a severe case of lockjaw
So I let them vent... and blow all that 
vitriol out of their collective arses."

"It becomes for me... my life's
wheeeeeeeeeeee moments!"

Consider the Source

"A viewer asked me why all insults posted in 
chat rooms roll of my back.
I said that I just consider the source." 

"And I know without any shadow of a doubt 
if he had a smokin' hot babe by his side 
he would have no time to try to annoy me."

"Who is the pathetic one in this dynamic?"